Archive for the ‘Family’ Category

You’ll shoot your eye out!

A mile and a half hiked! Almost done!

Over the past 10 years I have really been all over the grid with my weight. I was always successful in losing when I wanted to but whenever I would get where I wanted to be, I would end up pregnant. Now I love my sons with every inch of myself (even the inches they gave me that I didn’t want) but it was getting to be to much work. Now that my youngest is 3, there comes a time when you can’t scream “BABY WEIGHT!” anymore.  I am done having children ( I think?) so I knew it was time to get moving. In February I made a choice to change me life in a huge way and shortly after that I decided that it was time for more big changes.

For many years I had my weight put down by the one person who was supposed to love me unconditionally. It didn’t matter that I had moved 500 miles away from all my friends and family and was depressed,  “battled” 2 pregnancies (9 lbs and 10lbs 11oz!), the death of a parent, death of a grandparent, a surgery, and some other wonderful life things.  I know that I played a hand in the weight gain as well but any woman (and caring man) know,  those were all major things to happen in ones life.

I have made many conscious decisions to change the eating habits of the boys and I. I love food, I was not willing to eat cardboard to be skinny so I made changes where we did not notice them but they made a difference in the calories we consumed in the foods we ate everyday. Simple things like switching  to 1% milk as we drink A LOT of milk, light pancake syrup, frozen yogurt and sherbet instead of ice cream etc. The changes for us were big but small in we didn’t notice the change.

I am happy to say that I am now 20 lbs lighter and have reached my first 2 goals. Like everyone else I wanted immediate results and the first step is to realize it takes time. I still have a little bit to go but I am confident that I will reach that. Some plans for November that I am really looking forward to will mark the time frame to complete my next goal. That goal is to be done losing.

I would love to hear any advice on food, working out etc that has worked for you! With school right around the corner, please share your outdoor activities that can include a 3 year old. If I can do this, anyone can! I also had much inspiration from my dear friend Alan’s journey.

Nice Shirt me! What is up with my chin?

In the past few weeks I have made it a point to stop looking back on what could have been, who did what wrong, what if’s and just all of the negative that has been surrounding my life. If you are over the age of 12 and acting under 12, I have no use for you in my life. Accepting the way things have turned out does not make them hurt any less BUT dwelling on them only makes that hurt magnified.

About a month ago I found out the my cousin was dating a girl that I went to K-8th grade with. Not only was it so weird (good weird!) to see her again but because of my connection with her on Facebook, I started to get other people requesting me from school! People I had not seen or spoken to in almost 20 years.

I had chosen in the past to not give myself enough credit for the good person I am. I have said before, we all make stupid mistakes but that doesn’t define us as a whole. Don’t forget your mistakes because they do help you navigate your future. If you don’t learn from them, the mistake was for nothing.

I actually reconnected with someone that I had “dated” 6th through 8th grade. I quote because how much can you really date or understand feelings at 12/13? I moved out of NJ  when I was 13 so there was really no way to find that out at the time. I decided to go back home and see some friends again. My intention was to see a bunch of people but I never made it. I spent an amazing 14 hours with an amazing person. It is truly a speechless moment when you can instantly reconnect with someone as if no time had passed at all.

I kept myself closed off for many months because of what I thought I wanted for my life. I have come to realize that what “I wanted” was only what I was willing to settle for or thought I deserved. I held back from doing things that I thought were not okay for me and it took only him, who always knew me, to help me see that all I was doing was punishing myself for the actions of others. I deserve to be happy and loved just like everyone else.

I am overcome with this wonderful calmness. I am happy to tell all of my friends that I was able to let go and it felt great. I smiled and laughed so much that my cheeks hurt!